Repentance involves changing one's affections - from earthly things to heavenly things, turning to the living God from a god of self, looking unto Christ instead of looking unto another.

Repentance requires the right attitude towards sin. This is Godly sorrow. Repentance is the right attitude toward God and toward self. It is not quitting a sin for a season, it is totally turning from that act of sin. It is a complete one hundred-eighty degree turn. Repentance is not concealing sin. Concealing sin is like trying to cover up spilled seed in order to hide it. The seed comes up and is exposed.
Repentance must be followed by works proving that change. In Acts Chapter 19, verse 19, the repentance was evidenced in the bringing of books valued at fifty thousand pieces of silver and burning them before all men. This let all men know of the change.

If you are asking why your life is the way it is? The answer is simple.
You are the way you are because you chose to be the way you are.
What you chose is going to manifest itself.
Happiness is the beginning of choice